Chemo Round 6 day 9

My bloods have definitely dropped. Cry at the slightest thing and I am so tired. Doesn't help with an inflamed skin tag guarding my bowel entrance but Dr has prescribed Naproxen so have fingers crossed.
As I am not well enough to drive I hitched a lift to Cheltenham station with Colin and Sandra as Sandra had got Colin an appointment there today. I stayed in bed all afternoon, went to the Docs for my drugs, tried to eat and went back to bed. I feel so exhausted. Holly's been out shopping in Street with the Bebbingtons. Thanks guys.
I have just had an update from Colin. He has had his first of 5 doses of radiotherapy today at Cheltenham. This is good and well done Sandra for not accepting the 1st appt of next Wednesday :-)

Chemo Round 6 Day 7

Side effects has not been severe as last time however they have been present. Muscle ache and mouth being sore are the worst. Constantly using the mouthwash since last week has helped and ibuprofen are keeping things at bay.

For those of you who know my brother Colin and are aware that he has 2ndry kidney cancer in his lungs, sadly more nodules have been discovered in his brain after a scan. I am in Worcester at the moment but thankfully he now has an appointment with specialist on Thursday in Cheltenham. Providing I can grab a good nights sleep and ensure i am ok I hope to go home soon now. Whilst i know i have to look after myself i couldnt leave until the appointment got confirmed which it did today.

Sue

Chemo Round 6 Day 2

Yesterday's chemo went through without any hitches this time. I suspect this was because they have reduced the dosage by 10% to ease the severe side effects I had last time. Slept through the night with the help of a z tab but had to be done. Feel tired today still so just chilling.

Pat have uploaded a picture just for you taken at the end of June with me wearing Dolly. I look really well apart from the bags under my eyes and it's quite deceptive as I don't feel as well as I look. I delayed my chemo for a week to go to London for Leina's brothers wedding and met up with Cathy & Polly on the Sunday. Had a fabulous weekend which has broke up the recent routines of needles, scans and such like. I'll place one with my bandana on next blog.

Going to Hereford the weekend to relax with Leina and Paul can't wait and fingers crossed for minimilistic side effects that are due to start Tuesday -but am all prepared !!

xx

Chemo Round 5 Update

Had pre assessment today and bloods are ok to proceed with round 6 tomorrow. The breast care nurse appeared for my appointment today ummm.... Due to the severe side effects I experienced they are going to reduce the dosage by 10% and all systems go for tomorrow. I have ice, ice cream, drugs, straws, tinned soup and mouth wash which I have already started to take. Any change I have been told to phone in no matter how trivial apart from if I stubb my toe of course. I should be more aware this time I suppose and I've made it clear I do not want to go to MAU again so fingers crossed.

I have ultra sound scan 5th August, pre assessment for round 7 11th August and first meeting with surgeon on 13th August to discuss surgery options. All go at the moment.

Chemo Round 5 Day 13

Last Sunday I weighed 13st 2lb. This morning I was 12st 8lb. There has to be a plus side.
I got worse before I got better and because I didn't want to eat or drink much I didn't want to get out of bed either. Crushed ice (cheers Wendy ) before food helped and ice cream.
Unbeknown to me, Lynne was not happy leaving me on Friday so had confirmed my current state of health to my sis and picked her and Laura up from train station Friday morning.

Rachel took charge, phoned Dr again, applyed for Mobility badge for car, booked campsite for August holiday and took me off to hospital for brain scan. I was so glad she was here. Being hungry and thirsty because you don't want to eat is ok but when you can't because of scan is worse. I just started crying again in waiting room, tired hungry and thirsty. Scan complete and drank water mix of salt and sugar. I couldn't taste a thing. Tea was lovely, Laura made mashed potatoe just for me - Thanks Laura.

Saturday afternoon Kerri and Wendy turned up which was lovely. I did go back to bed for a bit and it was lovely hearing all the laughter going on as the Wii Fit was put through it's paces.

My temperature started to go up again on later on but fully armed with Paracetamol soon had this back under control and downed some food. Ate more as i was picking so that worked out well thanks Kerri and Wendy :-)

I am starting to feel better now, my mouth still hurts but is starting to heal so feel there is an end in sight. The Last 7 days have been the worst since I started chemo and Round 6 is due to start next wednesday. Previously I have been back at work this point in cycle. Today I'm chuffed I got up and ate something!!!

Chemo Round 5 day 7 - No Pain no gain !!

All I can say is what a turn around from breezing through managing side effects of the 1st 4 rounds then bang it it me like a brick. Tingly fingers and muscle ache like I've never experienced before started Sunday night. Mouth on fire and hadn't apprecicated my termperature was rising. Lynne took one look at me and was on the phone to the oncology then GP's before taking me to the Medical Admissions Units. This was not a pleasant experience and wont rush to go there again but I will take that up with the hospital. My temperature started to come down after being given paracetamol. Hey we all know that logic but logic went out of the window. I didn't get anything for my mouth until I was about to leave and currently I'm loving porridge!!!
I am feeling loads better then I was , shocked at how ill I dipped to. I have no energy, have to rest after eating porridge !! Lynnes making sure I keep fed and hydrated as because of my mouth i don't want anything. Getting back my sense of humour. Plans for Round 6 have now been laid. Paracetamol, iboprofen, teach Holly to make Porridge and she loved Dinner at the bebbingtons. Thank you guys !!!

Still not sleeping properly yet telling me my organs are still working overtime to detoxify the drugs through my system. My hair groweth is getting stronger which I find bizarre. Born again blonde on her way :-)

Chemo Reaction Update

Hi everyone, well Lynne thought she was gonna have a nice week off visiting Sue! Ha ha, Sue has other ideas!! Ok, well maybe not Sue!

This is just to let you all know that Sue hasn't been feeling very well, she's suffered with some side effects of the new chemo drugs. (Sue will fill you in on the technical details)

Lynne took Sue into Hospital earlier this afternoon as her temperature had shot up and she was feeling more wierd than normal!

As ever, getting her priorities in order, Sue asked me to update the blog to let you all know that she's ok and will be back informing you of all the gory details when she's feeling a bit better.

We'll be in touch very soon to let you all know how its going.

Rachel xx

Chemo Round 5

I know I haven't been updating the blog recently and sorry to those folks who rely on this to see how I am doing. The last 3 weeks have gone really quickly. Yes I have had a 4 week cycle again as Holly and I were invited to London for a wedding and also took the opportunity to catch up with some lovely friends.
An additional side effect of a burning sensation in my mouth added to the usual tiredness and changes in my bowel movements but again I have really breezed through round 4. Even went into work for over a week as well. Took time out in Torquay for enforced rest whilst Holly was on a school trip and made me realised how much I am NOT resting. Ooh no surprise there then :-)

So Monday I was buzzing. I had a faboulous weekend and gave myself 3 things to do when I have recovered from Chemo and my concentration levels increase. My pre assesment appt would confirm only 2 more cycles left and I was going to book our ferry and campsite to France for the end of the Summer. Nope this was all taken away from me Tues morning and I was gutted.
It started off wrong by me thinking I was 20 minutes late for my appointment when in fact i was 1 hour 10 mins early. Wrang work then settled down. Clinic was running late and I was seen just before 12pm by the Specialist Chemo Nurse. My bloods ticked all the boxes, side effects managable, she checked my mouth which had cleared up all ready to go for chemo. I have a concern about my short term memory and after disccussing this with her she felt it best to see the Dr and off she went. Dr arrvied with my notes as I havent had the offical results of my ultrasound scan . Cruella has reduced from 31mm to 21mm :-) . Repeated my earlier conversation on my concerns and Dr reassured me that this was common however would book me a CT Scan on my Brain. Also she had some news on my Treatment plan and that due to my age and origional size of Tumour that they have decided to change my drugs from FEC to Docetaxel (Taxotere). This is to increase the schrinkage for a cleaner masectomy. oh and yes that there would be 4 more courses starting the next day. She went to get an information leaflet for me to read and also made it clear that I didnt have to change but this would following NICE guidlings and positive results on other patients. I couldnt hold it in I cried. Additional side effects to be warned about are fluid retention particular in the feet, tingling in the fingers and muscle ache. I felt so dissappointed and we went through my chemo planner and happy to move the last chemo cycle to accomodate holiday plans. Off I went , got to work for 1pmish after scraping the side of Bluebell on the post. I was desperate for my refreshing cold sparkly drink so went to pop across the road mut Margie could see I was still traumatised and came with me to the stairs and off I went again. I hadn't had a trauma for ages but soon calmed down and reassured her I wanted to attend the pm meeting with my new team and was desperate for food and drink.
Before I left for home Kath turned round and sasked if I wanted her to come with me wednesday as there were still some clarity required and also pointout that the mornings events hadn't been handled well as I had no idea I was going to discuss a change of treatment and should have had someone with me. I accepted her offer of help. (Dont faint) and Kath called 9am and after a chat off we went.
First plan was to speak to the Breast Care Nusre - non available or Consultants so we went to the Beacon Day Centre (new oncology centre) and advised the Nurse what had happed and I need further clarity from Consultant before proceeding with the Chemo. Thankfully we were able to see the same Dr who not only apologised but advised she complained to her manager about yesterday's event. Not just me they had too busy a clinic and she felt she couldn't do her job the way she would have liked. We went through the treatment plan again and Kath also pointed out that being a single parent this impacts on my home life in terms of arranging support and taking this plan into September where Holly starts big school and yes holidays can always be rearranged but there would be dissappointment not just for me. We also agreed that in future I would not come to my Pre Assesment Appointments by myself. I have had Breast Care nurse before this didn't happen. Dr suggested we go and have a think and chat and come back and let the Nurse know what we had decided.
We did do this and discussed the other options and I felt comfortable taking the opportunity of changing the drugs. I felt I had now reviewed the choice I had and not rushed into things. Showed Kath where she could find me later, and got settled into be hooked and drugged up.
Firstly I had to have a steriod injection and left for half an hour - oh joy. Ray & Denise were there fromn the CAFE support group I go to and the lady I was waiting with yesterday the time flew. then my drugs finally arrived and the infusion started, Nurse Lorna handed me the buzzer in case I needed anything. This was new, they had never done that before. Well 10 minutes in and I could feel heat moving up to my face from my neck and I was not able to breath properly. Initialy I thought I was imagining it as I knew I was still traumatised as I call it. Ray called over , are you alright no i don't think I am. Have you pressed your orange button. No but did. Lorna came back along with 4 other nurses, my tears flowed. They stopped the infusion, pulled curtains round and passed me the oxygen mask. I calmed down and they explained that I had had a reaction to the drug and would have to wait now and take my obs and get the dr to see me. Got injected with someting couldnt rememer what they told me. Blood pressure ok, pulse ok, Dr breezed in looked at me at went out again!! Told this to Lorna and she said that was all she needed to do and that she was restarting my drug infusion but slower and stayed with me. When I had got past the point where I had reacted and all was fine she placed it on the same speed as before . Kath turned up with Karen (work colleague - cancer manager at trust) I started crying again as I told them what had happened. Karen had brought me a beautiful posie of flowers as well.
The rest of the session went by uneventful, Felt really sleepy but I had been injected with piriton, I thanked Ray for making me realise I wasn't imagining the reaction I was having. After getting my next appointments sorted I was about to call Kath and she turned up to take me home. What a day and it wasn't over.
Holly, bitterly dissappointed that I have decided we are not going to France ( KIDS !!) and asked where in this country would she like to go, decided to take herself off to the library to get the next book in the series she is reading, came back in tears as she had met a couple of school friends and the lad through a ball at her but it hit the back of her head and not being a soft ball was a hard ball. So I had to be nurse for a bit :-) She's ok now , a lump has developed and she can take this up with Jake today at school.
I have had a good night sleep waking up before 6am and feel quite chipper. Watch this space .....

Chemo Round 4 Day 7 - Cruella is Shrinking

I feel so tired but completetly elated that the ultrasound scan today confirms that Cruella has shrunk in size by 9mmish and the density has also reduced. I celebrated with an Iced bun and bought a Jam doughnut round !! (Holly ate hers without licking her lips). I feel so happy and lucky.

I suspect now that I will stay on the origional treatment plan of 6 cycles which means only 2 more to go. Won't think about surgery yet still a long way off .

Still feeling incredibly tired and managed a power nap today so feel quite chuffed.
Big smiles all round :-)

Chemo Round 4 Day 4 am

I am feeling much better this morning. Could have done with a bit more sleep but feel releaxed and pottering around the house tidying ect. Am planning a power nap before taking myself off to the pictures, Holly's at her dads and I have some friends arriving later.

My reflexlogy yesterday was wonderfull. Felt tearfull on way over , feeling tired and bored with all this now but reminded myself that I had managed 3 rounds , doing 4 at the moment and only 2 left to go (providing Cruella shrinks) and pulled mysellf together. Fell asleep in reflexlogy and a wonderfull session at meditation and felt much better about everything.

Still forgetting to take tablets which is abit annoying but at lease it was only one and not days this time.
Thanks for my messages Kerri amd Leina and will be in touch soon.
Sue xxx

Chemo Round 4 day 2

Well following last night's vomiting debut, my dinner decided to follow suit as well even though I had taken the anti sickness tablets. Went to bed pretty early and called hospital but just to let them know more then anything else. Checked my temperature which was ok. My friends was staying over last night so felt comfortable that I could go to hospital if necessary without worrying about waking the Bebbs up for an impromptu stopover so holly didn't wake up in an empty house.

Breakfast has stayed down and so far so has lunch so I think I had drank too much water for my body to absorb hence the rejection and it felt the same way about my dinner and the anti sickness tabs didn't stand a chance. Slept well though till gone 7am and still tired today but just just relaxing. So far so good ...

Chemo round 4 part 2

Well I was doing good. The experience was ok. Met some more lovely people and didnt cry. Still can't look though. Drank loads of water but sadly brought it all up. Didnt think i'd need antisickness tabs for water. Have kept my tea down so far but feel really crap and off to bed.
Holly doesnt feel to well either so I didn't push for her to go to scouts which has saved me a trip.

Off to bed now will catch up tomorrow

sue

Chemo round 4 Day 1

Well my pre assesment appointment yesterday was promising. My bloods are ok so I get the thumbs up for chemo round 4 (ok i snuck in an extra week as I went to Cornwall). Side effects have been manageable. It was not because I forgot to take steriods that I didnt have any mouth ulcers I've been assured by my Oncoolgy Dr that the chemo causes that (Oh well).

I think Cruella is shrinking as I cannot feel her through my bra any more and the Doc had to look hard for her yesterday as well. Fingers crossed that the Ultrasound scan next wednesday confirms the same. That would be great
My friend Bianca is doing the Race for life today at Silverstone. She has never done this before and is purely motivated by what is happening to me even getting her hair shaved when I had to do mine as it was falling out. If you havn't sponsored anyone yet and want to http://www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/biancamcgarry and don't forget to gift aid your donation.
I am going to take the DS and play Suduko today to take my mind off needles. Will be in the new Beacon Centre so not as cramped as previous visits. umm will let you know if this works

Sue xx

Chemo Round 3 Day 12

Well last week was a mixture of feeling great to feeling awful. Monday morning woke up after a good nights sleep and felt great. Tuesday felt even better. I'm doing work from home round my appointments. Wednesday, as I was working from home it came over me like a wave feeling nauseous. Shut down my laptop and took myself off to the sofa and watched a DVD and dozed before my afternoon appointment that day. Felt better in the evening but Thursday felt terrible again. Phoned hospital as didn't know whether to take my anti sickness drugs and or steroids to help. Before the nurse phoned back, I'd been to the Drs and took myself back off to bed after having a slice of toast. Anyway the confirmed that at day 8 I should only take the anti sickness tablets and call Friday if I felt no better. I didn't get up till 2pm and managed to get in at the hairdressers to have a fringe put in Dolly (wig) increasing this weeks of appointments to 9! Friday I felt fine again. A bit tired but not feeling sick hooray, in time for the weekend where Sarah and Cathy were coming round and we had a lovely time having foot spa, and giving feet hands and face a makeover with fabulous food and the odd glass of wine.

This morning been awake since gone 5am but feeling ok. Mouth has done well this round and feels normal , no ulcer. Just tiredness and feeling sick so not too bad really. Planning to work again this week around 2 appointments I have but still taking it easy.Got to save my energy for Cornwall next week he he. :-)

Chemo Round 3 day 5

Well my mouth is still ok, I'm not ravenous like this time last cycle, just incredibly tired.

Have had a lovely weekend starting with Lynne calling in who ended up cooking our tea whilst I had a nap as couldn't stop yawning. I did some aromatherapy massage and I got my crystals out. We both had the best night sleep for a long time but not enough to stop me going back to bed Saturday, after checking if there was any Rhubarb left at our local pick your own and there wasn't. I'm wondering if I'm resting too much as I am not exercising much apart from what I do on the Wii fit (ok walking as well). With that in mind I accepted an invite to my friends dads 70th Birthday party Saturday night. Holly even volunteered to help out with decorating the hall etc. Thanks Laura and Alex, Holly thoroughly enjoyed herself and when we both turned up later in the evening it was Sue Holly and friends enjoying themselves and I lost the Sue who is living with breast cancer.

After a restless night sleep, I carried on this thought of Sue and Holly doing their thing and took us off orienteering. We didn't get lost after finding the starting point and thoroughly enjoyed the walk. Stopped off at a car boot sale on the way back. Holly groaned but happily took part in the purchases we made. Came back had dinner. Nige came round with some shopping. I am useless at asking for help but when Anne put's you in a corner with "We're off to Asda do you want anything?" it works and really appreciated it even if I didnt have the main ingredient for Rhubarb Crumble!!

Every day next week I have an appointment with 2 appts on Friday. Already I am feeling anxiety over it all. Thankfully not having a midday sleep and taking part in some excercise today will induce a good nights sleep. Watch this space...

Chemo Round 3 part 2 !!

Thanks for that update Rachel.
I knew it was going to be a long day Wednesday. Tuesday started off ok. Went to work before going to CAFE group. Had a neck and shoulder massage and some crystal healing before getting to the Hospital for a blood test and pre assessment appointment. Was'nt kept waiting long and was called in to see the Oncology Dr. He asked me what I understood about the Ultra Scan that I had last week. I confirmed that I knew that Cruella had'nt grown but not shrunk either and they may change my drug combination extending my chemo by another 6 weeks. He agreed with this but advised that the decision on changing the drugs would not be made until after cycle 4 and would like to examine Cruella still. I went to the bed and took my top off and before I could take off my bra he asked what I was doing with a rock in there. I was gobsmacked as this was a rose quartz that was placed when I had my crystal healing and couldnt believe I had walked out with it and all had a giggle over it. We touched the subject of surgery as I need to know timings from a practical point. It will be after chemo and likely to be September. He mentioned that I could do with loosing weight for reconstruction but I dont want to know the details yet. This appointment didn't take long, only an hour on the car park.

Decided that I would walk to the hospital Wednesday, got their earlier to look round the new cancer centre that is opening on Monday. Went off to have my chemo, my appt was at 11.30 but took an hour before I even got hooked up. Yes I looked away and cried. I was left for ages before they brought in my drugs. They didnt loose my lunch this time. They were not ready for me and on checking they were not expecting me till 2pm. It was 1.45 pm before I got out the room. As I had another appt at 3 had agreed to meet up with a friend who was with her mother having her first chemo at 2. I loitered till about 2:45pm and carried on chatting in the waiting room with the other people that were there. Then I went off to my counselling appt and more tears flowed. Got out around 4.15 and decided to walk into town and catch a taxi or bus as was knakered but then one of our senior team was leaving the hospital at the same time and gave me a lift home. Bonus !!

Felt absolutely knackered and tearfull when i got in. Holly was not feeling well either. She's been with her Dad the weekend and we got told Wednesday evening that her sister has chicken pox so I think she is fighting that breaking out. Decided only fish and chips would do and that is what we had. I didnt reaslise till this morning that I hadnt taken my anti sickness tablets but wasnt feeling sick or anything.
Didnt sleep well last night. Got Holly home as well today as she's still poorly. Got back to bed around 12 and didnt get up till 2.30pm. Wasnt hungry this morning and didnt eat until I woke up this afternoon. Left most my tea as well but have decided not to take my anti sickness tablets as still not feeling sick. As advised by at the Dr earlier I have started to take Senna now rather then wait to be consitpated.

Also my next Chemo appt is going to be moved from the 27th May to after my holiday in Cornwall, 3rd June. I did say we could come up for the day if they change the date as it was actually on Holly's birthday but the team are happy to let me delay the chemo for a week. I'm chuffed i'm not interrupting our holiday but not chuffed by extending my treatment but then whats another week and lets hope it's not another 6 weeks that will get added if my drugs are changed.

Chemo Round 3 – Day 1

Sue ok but not feeling like writing anything much. So you got me here today, on Sue’s behalf, I’ll try and keep it brief.

Ok, Sue went and had a look round the new Cancer Centre today, and was very impressed with it all. I know it sounds wrong, but she’s looking forward to using it.

Bit of a mix up with her Chemo appointment time this week, her card said 11.30, but they had her booked in for 2.30, oops!!, so she ended up being there quite a bit longer than expected, which had not been good for her today as she was already not feeling particularly good.

Whilst waiting for her appointment with the counsellor, Sue met up and chatted with some people that she’d met previously, who are also having treatment.

Sue felt the counselling session went well and has realised that she’s holding onto a lot of stuff and has worked out a programme with the counsellor to help her deal with her issues.

As she left the hospital to walk into town to get a taxi, a member of the senior management team drove past and gave her a much need lift home.

Sue wanted to say that although she’s feeling very weepy, she’s doing ok and not to worry and will be reporting as normal soon.

Rachel x

It's Ok to Cry

I do know that but not over nothing. Must be me hormones....

Tuesday I found it a real effort to go to the CAFE group but I was motivated by knowing I would feel better for it. When I got back I had a card in the post from Rachel of the painting we saw in the Birmingham Museum January of Monte Civetta from Lake Alleghe by Elija Walton. This made me estatic as when I use meditation and mountains are mentioned this is what I was visulising before I had even seen it. The painiting in the museum is one awsome sight.

I had a Ultra sound scan Wednesday and Cruella hasn't grown but hasn't shrunk either. Will know more on Tuesday when I go for my blood test and pre assement appointment as to what changes may be made. Either change of drugs or surgery brought forward. I can't deal with the surgery details at the moment only the timings for practical reasons.

It was good when I got into work. It is lovely to see everyone and I managed some work as well. A small bit of normality surrounding the Hospital and Dr's appointments. Can tell when I start to feel better as I even bought a bottle of wine on my Asda trip and had a glass (ok 2 ) with dinner. Will have managed 2 and half days this week!

I have a mouth ulcer that is annoying me and is not responding to Anbesol so I am going to ring the Dr's to see if they can prescribe anything stronger. Any ideas welcome.

I am really looking forward to the weekend. Holly is off to her dad's for the weekend but Rachel and Laura are coming down. Saturday we are just staying here and chilling, may get Laura to finish the cleaning patio and mow the lawn. well ok it's worth a try :-) Sunday we are going on a day trip to North Devon so the sun better come out to play.
Hope everyone has a lovely weekend like I'm going to , have a good un

Sue

Summary of Chemo Round 2

Well I'm on Round 2 Day 12. I have noticed a difference from day 9 (Friday) onwards with tiredness and my nose has started to bleed, spots but bleeding all the same and as it's my blood I found the first episode traumatic. Please note the use of the word FIRST as I am cool with it now however I did phone the Hospital and burst out crying to them that my nose was bleeding but not horrendously and wanted to let them know and confirm what I would need to do.

I am sleeping ok now but some mornings I wake at 6am but then I managed to back to sleep Sunday morning and didnt get up till 9am. I am going to back to bed around 11.30 am and getting up around 1:30 - 2pmish. I dont like being in bed when Holly comes home from school.

Kerri came down from Worcester Saturday afternoon, laden with all things healthy (including Red wine as in small doses...) We also went into town and I bought another beanie hat and some more scarves. Kerri also bought me a lovely hat which I wore Sunday afternoon when I took Holly to her St Georges day parade with the Scout and Guide movement. We finished off the evening with a spot of Wii fit , and a chinese takeaway with Vern who popped in on his way back to Brackly from Minehead.

Today I was awake at 6am so started reading a book kerri brought with her called The Breast Cancer Book which i am finding very interesting. I have a similar outlook and humour as the author. Holly came in and joined me around 7.15am so we chatted for a while which was lovely. I had said to her I might not be up and she seemed pleased I was awake but at least didn't insist I take her to school.

My nose keeps spotting blood or clear liquid, my right cheek has a red patch on it with some spot type lumps and I felt better after my mid morning nap. I am managing to sleep without Z tabs which I feel better about. I am starting to remember my dreams at the moment, they had been quite for a while now but have started up again so will start to write them down.

All in all round 2 again was managable, more tired from day 9. I understand my bloods are at their lowest but was amazed at the difference and how quickly the changes were. I had been ravenous from Sunday , then Friday morning woke up feeling great and within 2 hours I had lost my appetite, nose bleeds, tearfullness and more tired. How quickly it all changed was frightning on it's own.

I am preparing to work this week and already arranging some holistic care for diffusing the anxiety and trauma of blood tests and chemo next week. Time flies...

Life is for Living

I keep having these wonderful powerful thoughts even when I successfully have an afternoon nap. I will have to start writing them down but on their own you'll think I'm bonkers. Ok you already think that!

On Monday I started an experiment. I have shaved my legs and we are going to see how quickly the hair grows back. Today is Wednesday and still no stubble. I have had to trim my finger nails and my hair on my head is still falling out so this doesn't make too much sense. Scientists out there answers on a postcard please... .

Tuesday at the CAFE group I had a foot massage and some reiki again. Always come away feeling relaxed. Popped into work quickly after lunch and explaining how meditation and Rekie works really well for me, Sara asked if I stayed quiet enough for meditation , have to admit i do surpise myself sometimes :-)

This morning started out with the Marmite jar jumping out at Holly and smashing everywhere. Luckily she didn't hurt herself and her stomach ache went away. Finished off today being at the cimema to see 17 Again.

Good news received about Colin, he is having limited side effects on his HD IL-2 treatment he started on Monday at The Christie in Manchester for his cancer. I am so relieved although I do appreciate like myself these are early days. Good news all the same.

The weird feeling in my mouth has disappeared, the smelly eruptions are still happening, still feeling tired and incredibly hungry and looks like I shall win the title for the first in our family to be bald...